Stepping Through Time

Photo: Mehdi Messrro

Most of us have an acute understanding of time. We can’t help it. Time is drilled into us from the moment we are born. If we are fed on time rarely do we struggle, but if we are neglected and must go hungry our sense of time becomes paramount. Time, whether our needs are met, or we are forced to wait, defines us.

I am learning to use time in a more abstract way. If I adhere to schedules, which I must, then this will use one part of my brain, and I’m fine with that, but there are ways to move through time that makes time less controlling and essentially more freeing.

I make a good student of time. In fact, I am almost always on time, rarely late, so I have learned to use time in a way that gives me control over it. This way it does not control me. I am choosing how to be in time by mastering time, and I master it by working with it rather than letting time chase me. By getting out ahead of time, instead of following time, time does not get the upper hand. To do this we need to have a new relationship with time. We must step through it.

And what do I mean by stepping through time? Stepping through time is being present with time, in a relationship with time, being one with time rather than letting time be on one side of the coin and our self on the other. Let me try that again. If we are, say, outside time, time is this thing of the past or it is this thing of the future. Stepping through time, essentially giving time neutrality, puts time in the NOW. Time is not an either/or and nor are we. Time is present. It just is. It can’t be on one side of the track and our self on the other. Bringing time into balance is key. If we fight time, time will win. If we don’t fight time, and we ignore time, time will still win. Therefore, to gain a sense of neutrality regarding time, essentially stepping through it to find balance, we need to let go of the perception that time can win.

Time can’t win when we step with it and slightly ahead of it. In our minds this gives us control over time. Time works with us. Not against us. We can actually gain time.

Time management is a blessing for me. I somehow understand this extremely abstract relationship to time and time doesn’t continually hit me over the head and push me farther and farther away from my goals. I know there are many people who don’t sleep, or exercise, or meditate, or prepare their own food, or take care of their bodies because of this illusion of lack of time. I have to say it again. If we’re chasing time, time will win. And in many ways it is the mind that controls this narrative. Because I can visualize myself stepping through time, being fine with time, accepting time, I can actually meet my goals because I’ve said, “OK time, we need one another. There is no other choice. But rather than have it be about me chasing you, I will control this scenario.”

By stepping through time I am able to take a step ahead of time. Time isn’t. I am.

As abstract as this is, we can make acute changes in our psyche that can shift our relationship with time by first acknowledging our own personal narrative, this complex relationship to time. I have made peace with time. I answer to many people, but as I answer to them I must equally take time for myself. We’re only as productive as we give ourself permission to be. We’re capable of giving to others, not necessarily when our needs have first been met, but when our needs and the needs of others have been met in balance. This is hard to do, because we’re accustomed to clicking our heels when someone needs us just as we expect someone to click their heels for us when we are in need.

Stepping through time is about being in balance. It is accepting that time is. It is accepting we have a relationship to it. And it is acknowledging the difficulty of getting our needs met when time appears not to be on our side. But by changing the narrative, our mind’s response to being in time, we can actually step away from past constraining ideas that keep us chasing our tails as we try to get ahead of time. By not resenting time, or judging time, or kicking time under the bus, and accepting it as a fundamental part of being, we’ll be OK. I really do think it’s possible to be in balance. It’s time.

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Reiki Master and Author of The Intrepid Meditator and Room Service Please. Let’s connect: &

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Alicia Cahalane Lewis

Alicia Cahalane Lewis

Reiki Master and Author of The Intrepid Meditator and Room Service Please. Let’s connect: &

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